Medieval Woman

The other day in the cafe I was singing along to some great Electric Light Orchestra, when "Evil Woman" comes on. Now for those who know ELO, they sing in some really great falsetto most of the time, and their words can often be slurred. Also I'm really bad at listening to lyrics of songs and typically learn songs by the way that they sound versus actual content. So the chorus entails singing "evil woman" a couple times (hence the name), but "evil" is spaced out over a couple staccato-like syllables… so in my world, falsetto + slur + staccato = "medeival woman"… and that is what I've been singing for years… in an instant, I realized that the name of the song MIGHT correlate to the lyrics of the song which I clearly didn't know… this happens to me all the time. I actually listen to what I'm saying and I realize that I don't know what I'm saying and I learn something… and tell no one of my brain fart moment... until now.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9qeJskx6r0

so that got me thinking about medieval women and what they had going for them: the plague and hairy legs. Then I did some research…

turns out they liked to fish, kill things with arrows, play with dogs and play the trumpet!

Also all of them look sickly… always.

Its a must or you have to go to a different time period where you'll be accepted for your health.

Swan sitting… this was before animal rights activists stepped in and banned the practice.

They liked hats…. and partial moustaches

Looking bald was really cool.

some of them had to wear collars so they wouldn't lick their bulbous plague sores.

Then this picture made me think of the royal tenenbaums, but less masochistic

also this Mexican ATV gang.

Most importantly, this picture proves a woman's role was to decimate the weak.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hi-ykpDFKwA

So after being blasted with musical excellence, I am completely spent. My lovely roommate treated me to a concert that I didn't think I was going to be able to attend. Delightful!

Jonsi concert 2010 holla holla! Soooooo great! It was outstanding visually and audibly. It was like the opening ceremony to the olympics meets Planet Earth meets Sigur Ros... they birthed magic... and we were all covered in the musical afterbirth...

(thats the music birthing out the back of his head)

Go Do.

http://www.vimeo.com/10413594

Support future icelandic musical babies by clicking here:

http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/go/id363449185

Also, Last FM wrote the funniest freaking review on Jonsi. So here you go!

thats really small... just cut and paste yo-self some linkage:

http://www.last.fm/group/Jón+“Jónsi”+Þór+Birgisson.

So the concert was crazy great w/ serious visual magic. It was like the Olympics, but better because it was live... and with good music

Lets recap the opening ceremonies and why I liked it.

Well, I wouldn't say this was a favorite moment, but I mean... really? What the crap w/ the frozen totem zombies? Really? And those poor first nations dancers that got conned into dancing for a good hour straight... they didn't even have time to stretch.

YEEEEEAAAAHHHHH! First off, whales started swimming across the floor and then people's clothes started glowing and a giant bear came out of nowhere! It was AHMAZING!

This is the closest thing I could find to the random tapping fiddlers of Canada... I don't know what they meant, but their routine took up a good portion of the evening. Good thing I found this picture when I googled "kilt fiddler olympics"....

...it definitely entails all three.

I hated this. As a snowboarder, I was ashamed. Snowboarding became less cool in that instant of live red marionette snow-sporters suspended 100 feet in the air. Hate hate hate.

And who could forget this guy? There he goes.... Flying over the grainy fields in his neutral clothing and generic face...

I don't know who this guy is, but he's having a great time... and loving Canada.

Then someone decided to be very sneaky and crop one of Shaun White's finger's out and post it online. Don't worry guys. Shaun still loves America (and Scotland judging by his kilt-scarf) and whomever came up with that cropping idea was just sneaky sneaky. Its so original and funny. It looks so real. I'd be anxious to meet this comedian... because they're hillarious.

Also while searching for "kilt fiddler olympics" I found this plaid figure skating couple practicing a couple moves on the ice that probably should have been saved for the bedroom.

None of that! Get out of here!

Lastly, turns out using cell phones will get you a brain tumor... or better yet, if you keep your phone in your pocket, prostate cancer!

(clearly I've chosen the most recent photograph)

Luckily, I havent a prostate to cancer, but I do have a brain... SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: hold cell phone .98 inches from your head... (don't feel alone, I probably wont do it either)

Read it and weep folks:

http://www.pri.org/health/cell-phone-use-and-cancer1926.html

Today, during a class, I was completely distracted when the simple word "inbred" was spoken.

Clearly the only choice of my next actions was to google search "inbred" to see what I could find...

inbred gifting to the public #1

One of my favorite finds is that of Kenny the tiger.

He is quite possibly the best tiger in the world...

Also inbreeding entails dressing like your cousin/brother/significant other... always